was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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