Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
