OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
You're like the curious george of whores
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
