Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize