So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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