Do vagina's smell?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
