Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize