yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Randomize
