No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
