Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize