just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Im part way to drunk.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize