Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
