You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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