ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
