I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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