that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
