i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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