Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
This is the high leading the old right now
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
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