I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize