Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
