what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
you made out with another girl for some wings
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Randomize
