do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
There's always time for handjobs
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
