Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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