my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize