Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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