it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
it hurts more in the daytime
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
