I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
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