We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
