You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
