Porn is love you can see.
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I still have a little drunk in my system
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
