Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
