Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
