Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
