He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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