we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
