dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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