marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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