Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
My ass is underappreciated
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize