I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
