Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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