Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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