Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
