so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
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