ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
