I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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