Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
