From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
