lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
