well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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