in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Randomize
